CREATING YOUR IDENTITY
When we are struggling with motivation or struggling generally with mental well-being, we resort to immediate gratification practices such as snacking on unhealthy foods or become passive watchers of television or YouTube. This becomes a vicious negative cycle, and motivation to do more becomes less and less.
However, there is a way of getting out of this negative rut, and it starts with how you want to be identified. Below are the 3 key activities to get you motivated which will improve your mental well-being.
1. Ask Yourself – What Do I Want To be Known For?
How do you want others to see you? Are you known for having positive personality traits, or do you have more passive traits such as being a couch potato or passive sports watcher on TV?
Choosing identities that are realistic and include something you can find pleasure in will go a long way in ensuring success.
HIMbody recommends establishing 3 identities in the following areas:
1. Choose an Identity that Promotes Physical Health, such as:
* I am a runner
* I am a conscientious healthy eater that limits my sugar intake
* I am an outdoor enthusiast
2. Choose an Identity that Supports Your Mental Well-Being, such as:
* I am someone that regularly practices mindfulness
* I am someone that regularly practices gratitude
* I am someone that keeps in touch with others
3. Choose an identity that Supports Something That You’re Interested In, such as:
* I am an avid historian of X
* I am a guitar player
* I am a writer
2. Develop Good Habits to Support Your Identity
Once you establish your desired identities (should be something you can be proud of), then start developing small habits that if you stick to over time, will help develop those identities. Here are some examples using the identity examples from above:
If you choose to be a runner, then establish habits such as:
1. I will go for a 30 min run on the lakefront trail three days a week (Mondays, Thursdays, and Saturdays before dinner).
2. After lunch, I will take out my running clothes and place them on my bed.
If you choose to have a regular gratitude practice, establish habits such as:
1. I will practice meditation via my app for a minimum of 20 mins every day in the morning at 10am.
2. After breakfast, I will set up my meditation space.
3. After meditating, I will treat myself to two of my favourite cookies.
If you choose the identity of being a guitar player, you can establish habits such as:
1. I will practice my guitar every evening after dinner for 20 mins.
2. I will learn a new song once per week.
3. I will pull out my guitar and place it on the couch before I prepare dinner. so it’s ready to play after dinner.
3. Keep Up With It
This is the hardest part – keeping yourself motivated. Planning is easy, but being disciplined at keeping up with the habits that support your identity are extremely difficult when we are all busy with work, family, or other responsibilities (or even just staying motivated).
In addition, most positive benefits we receive are known as “delayed gratification” – for example we don’t see immediate results if we exercise, or we get a good education but don’t necessarily get a good job immediately.
The foundation of this recommended approach stems from the writings of James Clear, in his book Atomic Habits.
In it, he describes how to maintain healthy habits in the following ways:
1. Make them easy by making the cues obvious (seeing your guitar on your couch). When trying to break bad habits, do the opposite – making the cues that are associated with bad habits hard or hidden (such as hiding unhealthy snacks at the back of your pantry so you’re less tempted).
2. Utilize the habit stacking principle – after I do X, I will do Y. Take an existing habit and just add something onto it so that is is easier to remember and perform (such as taking out your running clothes right after lunch).
3. Create rewards to motivate you to keep up with the habit – after I do X, I will reward myself with Y (such as treating yourself to a snack after you exercise).
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